Moving On

Moving on
down that long and winding road
I stopped for a while
now it's time to pull out once again

One foot in front
of the other is the only way to start
put some miles behind
pack up the heavy broken pieces of my heart

Night seems so long
wondering, wandering, blind and wrong
but the sun keeps rising on each new day
with a promise and a song

Moving on
down that long and winding road
I stopped for a while
now it's time to pull out once again

So Many Years

I loved you for so many years
After so long, how am I to just let go?
I loved you through so many fears
Touching so deep I didn't know how to let you know

Time dulls the ache and thoughts fill with today
but the memories never fade away
Decades of accumulation leave no doubt
I could forget thousands and still never run out

I loved you for so many years
After so long, how am I to just let go?
I loved you through so many fears
Touching so deep I didn't know how to let you know

Did we walk away from all the worst or the best?
We passed most around, then failed the test
I hope you find a place of peace and love and rest
I hope your soul will be happy and blessed

I loved you for so many years
After so long, how am I to just let go?
I loved you through so many tears
Touching so deep I didn't know how to let you know

I loved you for so many years
After so long, how am I to just let go?

Pithy

One can be angry that the rose bush has thorns,
or delighted that the thorn bush has roses.

Things are seldom as they seem.
They are usually worse. And also better.

Half Life

She couldn't have really loved me
for how could she have treated me so?
But she knew she did
and I should have
For she thought I surely didn't love her
for how could I have treated her so?
But I knew I did

Where did all the hurt come from?
How did it swallow up the joy?
Why couldn't we beat it?

The toxic waste of pain left behind
has a half life
Now it's only half as bad as it was
and it will eventually be half as bad as it is now
and someday half as bad as that
But it will never be completely gone

Shell Point

I have come to Ft. Myers, Florida to take a job as the TV Production Manager for Shell Point Retirement Community. They do a daily, 30 minute magazine style TV show that goes closed circuit to all the units where approximately 2,000 people live. I was asked to take this job by the executive in charge of marketing, a man I have known as an acquaintance for many years. They really wanted me to come and asked me to just try it for a few months to see if it was for me - kind of a reverse probationary period. I couldn't think of any good reason not to take them up on the offer. I wasn't at all sure about it at first as I had my sights set elsewhere, but God slammed the other door shut and kept showing me things about this opportunity that just couldn't be ignored. My stuff is in storage in Orlando and I'm set for this to be a trial run, but already it seems that this is one of those “God things” and I think it's where I'm supposed to be. They set me up temporarily in an amazing house on the property that I can stay in until the end of the year if I choose. It has a bunch of furniture that I can take with me to wherever is next. After living in 110 sq. ft. for the last year I hardly know what to do with this whole big place to myself. The setting is a bit overwhelming, but I like it! Can't get too used to it though. I will not be able to afford such a view when it comes time to secure a more permanent residence. But for the time being, I'm trying to just soak it in. Thank you Lord.

bang bang

Today I met two Mexican farmers and had a nice chat about 200 acres of zucchini and got an invitation to come back to their farm any time. But it could have gone worse. In a bit of questionable wisdom I started out the encounter trespassing at dusk and after dark actually had two shotgun shells fired for the benefit of my warning. Fortunately they were really nice guys and didn't mind when I explained why I was nosing around.

In Ft. Myers

I'm in Ft. Myers for an indeterminate stay. Yes, I know it's 4:00 in the morning. And yes, I'm exhausted. I'll explain when I get a chance.

Back at Enigma

I played three more nights at the Enigma restaurant this week. Unfortunately the only picture taken during all six days was by a friend with a phone camera. It was from one night when I was outside on the patio where it was quite dim and the image is barely discernible. Lack of photographic documentation notwithstanding, It went even better than last week and I made the same amount of money again. I've pretty much made back all the money I have spent on musical gear since, well, since high school I think. It doesn't take into account all the time I have spent learning how to do what I had to know how to do in order to make someone want to pay me to do it. But all that doing was something I wanted to do for my own enjoyment so it really doesn't count in the equation now does it? Anyway, it was all great and I can't believe I have made so much money in the last two weeks doing something I have wanted to do for so long and something I ended up enjoying so much. It made me think about the possibility of doing it every week. That opportunity was actually offered to me, but for reasons I'll get around to sharing here in the not-too-distant future, I will likely not be able to take advantage of it. I would like to get back and I plan to do so, but after four hours a night three nights in a row for two weeks in a row, I actually started to develop a blister at the edge of the callus on my left index finger. It was pretty sore this morning. It's already getting better but I don't know if I could take quite that much on a regular basis. I'm afraid my fingers or my love for playing or possibly both might suffer. Doing it once in a while would be perfect and that's what I hope to be able to do.