Remote Control

I have discovered that my digital recorder has a powerful, supernatural remote control capability. I can leave it sit for days or weeks. Then, the first time I punch the red record button, a lawn mower or weed whacker will start runnning somewhere in the neighborhood. It happens every time! It's uncanny. At this moment a neighbor, completely unknowing that he has been prompted by the control of my index finger, is out edging his lawn with his whining weed whacker. It's 2:30 PM on a Wednesday afternoon. What is he doing home anyway?! It's supposed to be quiet on the block now. There is another mind control power of my recorder. This situation also gives me a powerful urge to start cursing.